When

Thinking back she couldn’t remember the first time she saw him 

As much as she tried, it wasn’t something she could place 

She did remember the peach blocked hoodie he wore in place of an actual coat 

A little big for a man of his stature is what she thought as it enveloped him in warmth as the cold winter air danced outside 

He would wink at her and she made nothing of it 

He would attempt to flirt with her and she would ignore it

He was as persistent as her ‘no’s’ 

He seriously asked if he could take her out

To which she giggled at the surprised reaction to those around him 

It wasn’t expected 

And still she didn’t answer 

He went on to hold her against his body 

Tight to his chest he asked someone what they thought of them together

He wanted affirmation of how nice he found them to be

But his question was returned with a blank expression 

One that didn’t care to answer the question 

And she laughed, not because of the question, but because of the stare 

Did he notice anything different?

Was he in a bubble while he held her?

Did he avoid the thought that perhaps he shouldn’t have asked?

She didn’t know and didn’t ask 

She simply noticed the reactions to his questions when it came to her 

But she didn’t think about him 

She didn’t know why he asked others and not her 

She didn’t understand anything that he may have felt when he saw her

But she still tried to avoid him until one day she didn’t 

She tried but that day he won 

It was just the two of them and he was close to her 

So close that she could feel his chest rise with each breath 

She looked at him and he looked at her lips 

He leaned in and she didn’t resist 

As his lips enclosed over her’s they both pulled away 

A reflex she didn’t expect from either one 

It happened though 

Marking something between the two that would stay forever 

Because it was a beginning… 

-Bionica

Don't kiss me

When they said goodbye

He didn’t try to kiss her 

He didn’t try to move his face closer to her’s when he leaned in 

He didn’t try to aim, go in and kiss 

He simply looked her in the eyes and said ‘we should do this again sometime’ 

And she couldn’t agree more 

She had such a nice time 

The conversation was good and she liked what he had to say 

She enjoyed hearing him go on about how the body is a temple 

She enjoyed hearing him talk about how he loves being able 

To give people the gift of a beautiful memory etched on forever on their skin 

He was just different 

He was open and thoughtful 

He didn’t care to hide anything 

He just expressed what he felt 

And she was able to be herself 

Her childish, wild extra self and he didn’t mind 

He accepted her as she was 

He must have seen something in her that many missed 

And she liked that 

She like that a lot…

Bionica

The Drive

It was an interesting car ride

One in which she asked questions to make conversation 

But he didn’t really seem too interested in replying to 

Maybe he had something else on his mind 

He wanted to know more about her

Specifically, why she was still single 

An age old question that she knew the answer to 

Yet she couldn’t really answer 

So she gave him a line 

The one that goes ‘I just haven’t made a connection with someone yet’ 

It’s pretty believable 

It makes sense and is logical 

But the real answer, she just wasn’t ready 

She just wasn’t ready to give in and give out 

To her a relationship meant giving parts of yourself 

That you just couldn’t get back 

It meant making memories that you could look back on 

And no longer care for the person that shared such moments with you 

She had to take a moment to breathe 

Did she want to continue building up knowing that the next brick laid 

Would be shared with someone different 

It was just too much for her at the moment 

But that was ok 

She knew she needed time to heal 

And when he leaned in 

She moved back 

She just wasn’t ready to give up more of herself 

Did he understand?

She couldn’t say 

But for some reason he wasn’t scared off

He wanted to stay…

-Bionica

Sparks

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They had been together for about a year

His kisses on her lips 

Her hands interwoven between the short strand of his hair 

Caressing his neck with each breath 

As his hand rested on the small of her back 

A luscious routine of what would follow 

After their weekly dates

Sometimes at a diner

Sometimes at the park 

Sometimes at his place 

Where they would end up canoodling on his couch 

But for some reason 

All his great qualities weren't enough 

Sure he just happened to be 

One of the hardest working people she knew

A wonderful son, great friend 

And among other things 

An incredible lover 

But it still wasn't enough 

The sparks weren't there 

To send her to the moon each time they kissed

The butterflies hid somewhere 

And wouldn't even flinch 

Not at his words 

Not at his scent 

And certainly not at his touch 

She wondered why 

Always giving it another try 

Another chance to see 

If perhaps the butterflies would come out of hiding

And make it a party when their lips would meet

When she would hear the sound of his voice

Or see a message he had sent 

But all the sweet mornings 

Good afternoons 

And beautiful evenings they spent together 

They just weren't enough 

The sparks never came 

Things just weren't right

Those feelings were missing 

She did what she could 

But he hadn't understood 

That what she wanted the most 

Just wasn't there 

She didn't dare ask him what he felt 

He may have gotten used to her

To the timber of her voice

Her hands in his 

And everything in-between 

But she still needed more 

And hoped that one day 

He would see what she meant 

-Bionica

Not Quite Right

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It was just so romantic 

The way he leaned in to hold her

Her hand fit so well in his 

His scent was delicious and subtle 

He looked at her and he cared 

He really did 

He wanted to know 

What she was thinking 

What it was that she thought of him 

But she just couldn't 

She had to tell him

That he was the right one 

At least not for her

Not after that momentous kiss

The one they shared 

Under the night sky 

With the glare of the street lights 

And the glow of the cars that went by 

She just couldn't do it 

-Bionica

And so we go...

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It's in there. Beneath that shell of 'I don't believe in love or any such thing' lies the dreamer that believes. Yes, as in those novels and fairy tales that begin with a 'once upon a time' there is a prince out there for each princess. Perhaps he's not as swift of a dancer to sweep her off her feet and carry her off into the night–but he will be enough to make her forget where she is. He will have her get lost in his words that are simple yet enchanting. He will tell her simple truths like 'I love you in that dress' or you should leave your hair down more, because it's just so beautiful. He will make her want to sway in the middle of the street forgetting about the cars beeping about the current traffic situation. Not sure about 'le raison de etre' but to her, his touch will be electrifying and soothing, something she just cannot get enough of. The love emanating from him that is truly obvious to those that see for his beloved queen that he doesn't often meet. 

But what about the reality? The reality that her close friends are still single battling guys they don't understand and trying understand why the dating scene is just so difficult. Preferring to remain in a relationship that gives more headaches than heartaches because of the some how infallible idea of being alone! 

Whatever happened to knocking on doors until the right one opened? Fear took over and with it came the complacency to settle for something shy from happiness to be aloud to say 'but I'm not alone'. 

This maybe why she's still single and 'with out a chance'–is she asking for too much? 

Not at all, she's just asking for a smile that will make her warm inside, for that brushing of hands that will put her nerves on high alert with the giddy heart palpitations that follow. She want's to get lost in a sea of people knowing that at the moment only they two exist. She wants what is true and meant to be, not something that's pretend and not supposed to be. 

-Bionica

Maktoub–Written

Have you heard the song 

"some people wait a life time 

for a moment like this 

some people wait a lifetime 

for that one special kiss " ♬

Well, it was one of those 

Something so unexpected 

for the both of us I'm sure

and yet it happened 

so caught up in the moment

that planning it would not

have come as close 

to such perfection 

It's like a puzzle piece
we just fell into each other

after being scattered around

someone like the Man upstairs 

put us together 

His lips fell into mine 

and they felt so right 

I myself was surprised to feel 

such ease and comfort 

His lips belong there

on my temple of love 

making their way to 

soft lips where 

the two meet to lock

His arms around myself 

my arms around his self 

and somehow 

we are lost in each other 

an embrace that will last forever 

Till the next time we come together 

-Bionica

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