How much longer?

I’ve gotten to thinking that the people that oppose same sex relationships have never experienced love 

They never experienced finding someone to brighten their day with a smile, someone that is understanding and speaks wonders to their soul

These people have been missing out on the joy of life and of love 

Their lack of such mixed with some other things has blinded them to the freedom of love 

Maybe…I don’t know, but it could be why they aren’t able to be happy to hear of another person experiencing such bliss 

To find a partner that makes their heart sing 

I read it all the time, how people have found their soulmates, their best friends… 

And I think to myself–well how beautiful is that 

And when you share such news with the world its because you want to some how have them feel at least a little bit of that love that you’re feeling 

But some people just can’t take it because they don’t know what it is 

They have closed themselves off to the love that is real and they have a rather warped view of things 

Their ego gets the best of them and it’s like a maze, no a labyrinth of things that don’t make sense and preconceived notions that lack love 

Take for instance people that follow things hardcore without room for error when they read holy texts

They forget that the golden rule clearly states to ‘love your neighbor’ –and to simplify things, ‘love your neighbor as you love yourself’

But they only repeat what they want 

They like to play games and guilt trip other people for things that make no sense 

It’s annoying and I’m totally over it 

I’m hoping that soon enough they will be over it too and finally open the door to love especially after hearing them preach so much…

How much longer though?

Bionica 

Self to Love

Sometimes she thought about all she wanted as a kid 

To have someone hold her hand 

To have someone accept her perspective 

Understanding that difference is beautiful 

That she will forever be beautiful 

But the world worked quite differently 

It wasn’t allowed to pick out the cards most liked 

It allowed to learn from the best and worst cards dealt 

To take in everything possible before picking another card 

Before making another move…

Something she sometimes lost sight of 

Because she just didn’t know what it was about 

She felt lost 

Like Alice down the rabbit hole 

She didn’t know where she was going or what she was supposed to look for 

There were no signs indicating what to do 

It was something she had to figure out on her own 

In her own time 

Even if it meant going around in circles until the lines became straight 

A door would open up and she would realize that she had to go around it a few times to see it 

It’s all part of the process 

The healing that she very much needed

Bionica

Thoughts

She wondered, what did she do?

What did she miss?

What game was he playing?

One day it’s I’d love to see you too 

The next day is silent and blank 

Like in between takes of a silent movie 

With a white question mark to show 

In the middle of the screen 

Searching her face for answers she cannot provide 

And so she didn’t 

She was tired of questioning something she would never know the answer to 

She continued going forward 

Occasionally wondering what if 

What could have been 

What could she have changed 

What was it that she did?

And then, something changed 

She grew tired of questioning 

She grew tired of waiting 

And so she moved on by herself 

With out looking back 

With out a question 

She ventured out on her own 

Without thinking of another

She only thought of herself 

Of what would be good for her 

Of what could help her grow 

Of what could help learn 

It was all she had left 

And it was a lot 

To learn to be alone and not just be content 

But to be happy with such 

She found herself 

And she loved herself 

Somehow all it took was a little bit of losing herself…

Bionica

Just 2

There they were, 2 girls in a coffee shop 

Trying to figure out their lives while drinking a coffee and a hot chocolate 

With 2 half eaten muffins on plastic plates 

Could it be more cliché?

Maybe…

But they talked about everything and nothing at the same time 

Such as how sometimes it’s best to be alone 

If those around you aren’t on the same wavelength 

Well it just means you have to keep on swimming 

They also talked about vibrators and soap when she gifted her friend a 

Portable charger with an Ayurvedic soap 

It was small, pink and pretty 

So the inevitable hiccup giggles came out 

A little soap for the prés a V hahaha 

It was about the jokes that made light of those life experiences 

That could sometimes be too much to handle 

Like the fact that after so much time she still didn’t know where she stood 

She wasn’t sure where she was going 

She wasn’t as lost as she was freshman year of college in a brand new campus 

Because this time she knew what she didn’t want 

But she still had a long way to go to find her way 

The home situation wasn’t that great either 

Not because she was misunderstood, but because no one tried to understand 

To speak her language was an ineffable thought 

Why would anyone dare to make an effort to know something that didn’t involve them?

We only live in a world with billions of people 

To learn more about them to be able to communicate better?

Well now, who does that?

No one at home

No one at home cared to see beyond their 2 hands 

Beyond their world and their cloud 

And that was the problem 

She would never be able to go forward when those around her 

Would constantly work to pull her back…

It was time

To let go without turning back 

Bionica

What did he know

The reason as to why she kept herself 

It was simple 

She just didn’t feel getting judged by a stranger 

A stranger who barely knew her on the surface

Yet would have plenty to say about her 

And what she ‘should’ be doing 

The reason as to why she preferred her friends 

It was that 

They knew her well 

They knew her struggles and how far she had come 

They knew all about the progress she had made 

They knew all about the process

But someone from the outside

Well they wouldn’t know much 

And she wasn’t going to tell them either 

But then he came along 

And she made it quite clear 

She wasn’t there to be judged 

She didn’t care to validate her being 

To a stranger of 24 hours or 24 days 

When he came along 

She made an attempt to push him away 

To keep him away 

But he just wouldn’t go 

And then he did it 

The very thing she had told him not to do 

He made assumptions 

He thought he knew her 

He said what he did 

He judged her 

Validating her adamant reason 

As to why she kept to herself 

He knew not of her struggles

He knew not of her triumphs 

He knew nothing of the path she had made 

Becoming a better version of herself 

A work in progress 

And he nothing of it...

-Bionica

But how???

He was on a roll 

Asking her questions 

Making her question 

What things are 

How should they be 

Who is to say what’s really right?

Who is to say what really is the key to happiness?

And so she thought 

To herself, not aloud 

Not with him 

She thought about how great money is 

It can buy a lot of things 

But she didn’t really care for things 

What she really lived for was those moments 

Those moments that like in that ever so famous cliché 

Takes your breath away 

Alas, it was true 

At least her truth 

She cared not to be wealthy in money 

It would be nice, but not a priority 

She just wanted to be happy 

She just wanted to be free

She knew very well that she could be broke 

Broke but happy 

Broken and glued together and sewn back in so many places

But still happy 

Because it wasn’t all that bad

There were moments

Moments life gave her that were just as beautiful 

As all the hurt she had once experienced 

But what about him?

How could she tell this to him?

How could she make him feel?

How could she help him enjoy 

The feeling of the wind zipping past his face

While he ran on the field…

How could she teach him to love early mornings 

The kind in which the sky is seen 

With clouds of pink 

Like neon cotton candy across the sky 

How could she teach him to adore 

Those loving whispers 

The ones made each night 

Right before she said goodnight 

How?

-Bionica