Not Quite Right

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It was just so romantic 

The way he leaned in to hold her

Her hand fit so well in his 

His scent was delicious and subtle 

He looked at her and he cared 

He really did 

He wanted to know 

What she was thinking 

What it was that she thought of him 

But she just couldn't 

She had to tell him

That he was the right one 

At least not for her

Not after that momentous kiss

The one they shared 

Under the night sky 

With the glare of the street lights 

And the glow of the cars that went by 

She just couldn't do it 

-Bionica

In the Jungle

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Yes the commute can be a hassle, but she loves it

She loves being able to wake up in the morning 

Knowing that she is about to enter the world 

Full of glowing outfits and different tourists

It's the possibility of new friends that moves her

The nuisance of movies being filmed that redirect the traffic 

The cabbies that prefer to drop you off at their convenience 

When you are clearly paying for them to drive you!

It's that daily argument between those coming and going across the street

The constant rush of bags swooshing against bodies 

Shoes patting and heels clacking across the floor 

She enjoys taking it all in and seeing how life just never stops 

How one island can hold so much difference at once 

It's a world within itself 

A culture to be experienced 

But more than that, to be enjoyed

It's the concrete jungle 

And she wouldn't change it for the world!

-Bionica

Firsts...

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My goodness, what is it?

What's that magical thing about firsts?

You know, the first time your hand brushes his 'accidentally' 

Yet no one retracts

You kind of just leave it there 

To see who's going to do the next move

And then of course 

The anxiety you get wondering 

'what's he thinking? do I look ok? 

Is there something in my teeth? ah what's he saying?

Gosh he's cute… 

Well this particular first was not exactly that and yet it was...

She walked in with zero intentions of romance

Just seeking good conversation with a new friend 

They talked about a sport she barely knew 

Aside from the fact 

That whenever the word 'goool' was said out loud 

A shot was taken 

So she stayed, not for the shots, but for the thoughts

The ones shared with with the stranger

The ones shared with a friend 

She looked not at the time, 

Not because it didn't exist 

But because she felt it as a passing element 

One that encumbers you, so that you know it's there

But says not a word, just listening and observing…

She looked at him, 

At the way his hand curved around the glass he held

Nursing a beer with way too much foam 

She looked at the way he pointed 

To the ceiling speakers as he looked at her

And sang along to the song played

It was nice, she liked it…

He stayed close and he removed her cloak 

Yes, her cloak, because a shell is just too hard

And it's something you have to break out of

But he, he gently removed it from her shoulders

Making sure she felt comfortable with his closeness 

Nigh was he too much, nor too little

He knew exactly when to lean in 

And hold her 

And she let him 

She found herself enjoying the comfort 

Of a person that was once a stranger 

She looked into his eyes 

And she just was 

She was herself without a pang of guilt 

Or an apology for any of her faults

For that what she lacked 

Or that what she had

And he took her in that way 

It was the first time for her

No critiques, no judgements 

It just was…

-Bionica

And the sun rises everyday

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She's twenty something 

Late twenties really 

Just a little before thirty 

She's from New Jersey 

But she work's in NY 

You know, that city where dreams are made 

Or at least created 

It's like a place that holds a lot of dreams really 

That  dream of leaving everything behind 

And starting a new 

Of becoming your own self 

With out a care in the world

At least not caring what anyone else thinks anyway 

Well at twenty something 

It's kind of when you come to know 

A lot of things 

Like the fact that as everyone else is getting married

You're still single 

Yet it doesn't' bother you 

But your friends, they start to want to settle down 

They don't all want to be 'late–

for that very important date'

Ah yes, life 

That thing everyone is trying to rush 

While those that take it in stride 

Are simply called hippies

Peace-love and flower power

But why rush?

Why are you trying to become 

That adult that hates the job traveled to every day

That looks forward to the evening to forget with a  glass of wine

The person that gets into a relationship to conform–

To the pressures of society, 

Those that say you should already be married with a mortgage 

And 2.5 children–point five!

What's the point of that?

Isn't that what drives to the point of no return 

Where so many people refuse to look back and 

Just go deeper and deeper 

You know with the abuse that no one will confirm out loud

Drinking, zanax and valium here and there

Because no one wants to feel…

But really, what's so bad?

If you didn't want it

Why did you take it?

When did you lose yourself?

Is that what being an adult is really about?

Well no wonder Peter Pan never wanted to be one!

She'll just stay

Stay right where she is and keep studying 

Keep learning about what she likes 

And what's right for her

At twenty something,

She might be on to something 

The greatest moments of her life

Because she wants to feel 

She's up for the ups and downs that will come 

She's ready for them 

To learn from them and embrace from them 

Because she just refuses to be that person 

That will let everything bring her down 

She won't conform 

She's going to rebel 

Loud or silently, 

She's just going to do it

It's the only way she knows 

And maybe that's part of her magic

That fairy dust that she just can't let go of 

Dreams–because they are achievable 

Did she just say that?

Cliché right? 

Oh touché

-Bionica

Thinking

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She was a couple years from 30 and still 

She thought she would be better

She thought that she was done with the adolescent rebellion 

That she never experienced

Yet it was still there

The break through she made 

Now had to be released and untapped 

Yet she didn't know how 

She didn't know how to bring forth those words 

That in her mind were slowly making their way 

She had partly made peace with the fact

That his absence hurt her like nothing else in the world 

But what then?

Did she tell him how she felt?

She didn't 

Afraid to bring hurt to him 

She kept it to herself 

Unsure if she would ever bring 

Such truth forward

Ah to be pensive 

-Bionica

Surprise

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She was single

At work 

And not dating anyone 

But she got them

Right in the middle of the day, 

She received word that there was a package for her

When she made it to reception, 

There they were

A beautiful assortment of spring tulips

Sometime in the middle of February 

What a surprise too!

But from who?

Inside there was a simple note with her name 

It read 

"I'm sorry"

No exclamation, no period, no comma

Just like that 

And she wondered all day and all night

Who could they be from?

Of course there were more than a dozen scenarios

Each one played out in her head with the same person 

Just ways in which he let her know that they were from him 

In all of them he showed up at her door with an even bigger bouquet 

Ready to surprise her 

Alas it wasn't him 

But someone else 

And then she wondered

"Did I really want to know?"

Would you? 

-Bionica

She did...

She did it! 

She closed her eyes and went for it

She told him about that feeling 

The one she gets when he looks at her 

That everything is ok because he's there to hold her hand

She told him how easy it is for her to get lost in his eyes 

And how much she loves the splendor of his speech 

The touch of his lips on her cheek 

A soft brush that only he can do 

The grip of his hands as he holds her close

And in turn he said not a word 

And she was lost 

In a world wind of questions 

'what did I do?'

'was it something I said?'

'perhaps I shouldn't have…'

But she did 

And she would do it again 

Because she tried 

To the depths of her self, she tried

She made that effort to let him know                                         

All the beautiful things he sowed with her                                                        image

Many the more illusions 

Of a love finally found 

Unmistakable smiles 

As they kissed under a thousand skies 

All the which she would do all again 

Because she loves him 

Because he will always be her present 

Because he will always exist in her moments 

-Bionica