The nature of some neighbors

 I know exactly what it is about my downstairs neighbors that rubs me the wrong way 

At my neighbors petition, the new owner of the house chopped down a kind cherry tree that had been around for more than 15 years 

Every year providing robust fruit and a sweet home for my bird friends 

They also took down the grapevine that had been growing for years without bothering a soul and providing for mediterranean grape leaf wraps 

There was a fig tree that they went on to remove and one that may have been a peach tree too, I’m not too sure

There was also a larger tree that provided shade and privacy in the summer without any threat of fall whatsoever 

Once chopped down mushrooms have made their appearance as what’s left of the tree begins to rot 

They have removed bushes from the property and worst of all, they have turned the yard into a partial dump 

Now the yard has 2 way too big bbq grills that barely get used, plastic lawn chairs that have seen better days 

A glass table with an umbrella whole but no umbrella and chairs that could be done without 

They throw out so much garbage to simply sit at the side of the house with useless things like styrofoam, old printers, fake plants… 

I just can’t understand how or why they have this odd attitude towards nature that is so good and giving to us 

But I guess they get it in other ways like when the gofer eats the tomatoes they plant among the plastic containers they leave in the yard after taking out the plants to be transplanted 

Oh and my neighbor had the audacity to say that I her crops get eaten because of me when she literally let’s them rot instead of picking them when they’re ripe and ready to give away 

She’s upset that I feed the birds, the squirrel and the cat that stops by on occasion to munch on food that would otherwise be thrown away 

She doesn’t understand the struggle we experienced throwing away food that would be all over the floor after my bird friends would peck at the garbage bag trying to grab a snack 

She doesn’t consider team work with my animal friends to make things better for everyone 

Instead she thinks the gofer eats her crops because I give them snacks and not because he’s a gofer that will dig tunnels and do what he wants

A squirrel friend will occasionally leave me ‘gifts’ of partially eaten food like a tomato or avocado here and there to say ‘hey boo, I appreciate you’ and although a simple nod would do, I’m not complaining 

I guess some people are like the lion & the tin man, without a brain or a heart 

To understand that we come of the earth but the earth does not come of us 

And so it is important to work together with nature and understand that it is a true blessing 

When your trees grow and give you fruit 

That the trees are our lungs and because of them we breathe 

But they just don’t get it 

And I’m completely over it…

-Bionica

To Belong

 I always tried so hard to belong 

To belong to the cool group of kids in kindergarten and be accepted by the Dominican girl with the Greek name like Oedipus’ mom slash wife 

But there was never anyone like me through out any of my school years 

There wasn’t anyone with whom I felt that I could identify with 

Not a single place where I felt that I belonged 

Not with my mother, father, brother or family 

My different tastes have always stood out like golden glitter on black paper 

But as a kid I didn’t see the sparkle

All I saw was something scratchy that would make an indent on my fingers if I pressed too hard 

I pressed really hard when I would get my hair straightened but my hair pressed harder when the Just for Me would grow out and it was time to do the roots again 

Aside from making every effort possible to change my hair, I also wanted to change my ethnicity and remember praying that my skin would be white 

That my name would be Melissa or Cindy, something that would be said correctly on the first try 

And when it was time to go shopping I would always pick out something that just didn’t go

And my mother would remind me of this constantly and even today want to change me up just to her liking 

Someone always wants to make an adjustment here or a tweak there to be more of what they like 

But the thing is that I don’t belong to them

I belong to me 

I belong to the happy girl inside that has learned to enjoy being the odd one out 

I have learned that my weirdness is mine only and can’t be taken away 

Does it make me shine like the glitter on the black paper?

Maybe or maybe not….

I know longer care if someone else sees the shine anymore 

I have learned that the sparkle is mine to love and appreciate 

Like the kinks in may hair that may be more coiled on one side than the other 

It’s part of what makes me great 

And the not belonging anywhere 

Well that’s no longer a cross to carry all sad like the men reenacting the stations of the cross

Now it’s what makes me strong to know that I don’t belong anywhere and that’s ok 

To know that I must be the happy home for my being 

Because I belong to me 

I belong to my happiness and my sadness all the same 

Because I don’t have to translate the language of my soul to myself 

I simply close my eyes and open my heart to feel 

Because all these differences, they belong to me so that I can just be… 

Bionica