What did he know

The reason as to why she kept herself 

It was simple 

She just didn’t feel getting judged by a stranger 

A stranger who barely knew her on the surface

Yet would have plenty to say about her 

And what she ‘should’ be doing 

The reason as to why she preferred her friends 

It was that 

They knew her well 

They knew her struggles and how far she had come 

They knew all about the progress she had made 

They knew all about the process

But someone from the outside

Well they wouldn’t know much 

And she wasn’t going to tell them either 

But then he came along 

And she made it quite clear 

She wasn’t there to be judged 

She didn’t care to validate her being 

To a stranger of 24 hours or 24 days 

When he came along 

She made an attempt to push him away 

To keep him away 

But he just wouldn’t go 

And then he did it 

The very thing she had told him not to do 

He made assumptions 

He thought he knew her 

He said what he did 

He judged her 

Validating her adamant reason 

As to why she kept to herself 

He knew not of her struggles

He knew not of her triumphs 

He knew nothing of the path she had made 

Becoming a better version of herself 

A work in progress 

And he nothing of it...

-Bionica

Different

Growing up she always wanted to be different
Different from the person she was with curly hair, dark skin
and a name that most people just couldn't pronounce

She wanted to take on the identity of a fictional character
like those on tv where the girls had great hair and the nicest parents ever
the kind that had really good jobs
yet they found time to be home with their kids
and help them with their homework
they knew exactly what was going on and spoke perfect english

But that wasn't exactly so
She hailed from the 6th floor of an apartment in the projects
where you could hear Frankie Ruiz loud and clear
as a 'hot' car drove by with the best sound system ever

The neighborhood parents spoke broken english
and would work when they found something they liked
if not, they would make the welfare line to ensure they would have
their food stamps at the beginning of the month
and they would never miss the WIC appointments
that granted them milk and cereal

She wanted a name like Melissa with a friend named Stacy
she wanted to hang out at The Max and giggle when her crush looked her way
yet she was way too far from that

The friends she made a school could have formed a map of South America
most of their parents were first generation
working hard to give their kids a good education
the kind that would get them into a good university
where their kids would meet others who did have a name like
Melissa & Stacy
with parents just like those on tv
the kind that would speak perfect english
with mothers that wore pearls over a lavender cardigan
with an over the knee pencil skirt

But by then, she would have already grown to love
everything that made her different
the name that no one could pronounce
with the handle downs and discount clothes
while the girls that sat behind her in class wore Acne jeans 
with Calvin Klein tank tops and those jacquard handbags
ones that she had never seen before

By then the differences that she once hated
were the ones she loved the most
because they made her who she was
they added to her story
they made her proud of the colored threads that made her quilt

And she was proud to her own self
woven with different colors
the ones she finally came to understand
-Bionica