To Be...

Yesterday it was just supposed to be Cheo & Vanessa 

They were supposed to be slow dancing as they warmed up for their scene 

But instead of being my character 

I was being me 

Because of the many things that went through my head, it just took me a while to her 

To begin, I think it was the first time ever that I slow danced with a boy!

Yes, I know right, because bachata doesn’t count 

If the Salesian Sisters at my high school would have seen me 

They would have commanded us to ‘leave room for the Holy Ghost’

I thought to myself, ‘omg do I smell? What if I smell? What if he doesn’t like the way I smell

I did wash my hair on Friday, so I know it’s clean 

Ugh why is this so awkward?

Why am I so awkward?

How long are we going to be dancing for?

This is way more than the 30 seconds our teacher said it would be 

Uy what if he all of a sudden gets a major boner 

Like in the movie on Netflix Yes, God Yes! 

The poor boy said he warmed up like a microwave 

And here we are, super close…’

However, we didn’t step on each others toes 

And after a while I just let my head rest on against his 

The weird part? We were soon in sync 

The odd part?

That all through out romantic comedies I can almost bet that I’m not the only one that thinks 

‘Oh what if that were me’–then when it does happen 

I’m not supposed to be me 

I’m supposed to be the character I’m playing and be in the moment 

Who would have thought that after wanting to be the protagonist for so long 

I would feel so odd & awkward the day it happens

I guess that’s my major growth area 

To be the character 

To be present in the moment 

To simply be… 

Bionica