The One

Maybe it's just not for everybody
that one person that's supposed to be
your one true love

the one that you supposedly dreamed about
since the moment you were able to remember your dreams

Maybe it's just about momentary bouts of happiness
that different people are able to
fulfill at different moments

instead of that single one
there are probably a lot ones
times 5, 7 or 8 for all you know

the kind that are 'the one' for that specific moment
so that when you look back and remember
at that trial, tribulation or fun
you're able to smile
because that's just how it was supposed to happen

for the stories, the moments
for the lifetime of experience that
you just wouldn't be able to have
from just that 'one'

Because that's way better than none
Because that's what was just meant to be…
-Bionica

Reasons why she's still single

After giving it some thought
she came up with a few reasons
as to why at the age of 28+
She's still single

For starters
She don't date
She just looking for a spark
With out the spark she won't even try

And then
how can she meet someone if she doesn't go out?
her evenings consist of spooning her maltipoo
while watching movies about dragons
and mythological deities
She's also gotten very into the travel channel
falling in love with all these discoveries that
seem to bring out her inner nerd

And when she talks
it's like a hyper bunny all over the place
that laughs at her own jokes
regardless if they're funny at all

Who ever she meets must be approved
by her dogs
the 3 that star in biweekly snaps
with funny voice & filter

At 28+ she might be too goofy
a tad bit nerdy
and just all around weird
with out a care in the world

Hence her hair is never done
and her idea of dressing up
consists of stepping out of her chucks
and into the patent leather flats

to be worn with an over the knee dress
and just really big hair

This is why at 28+ she's still single
-Bionica

Different

Growing up she always wanted to be different
Different from the person she was with curly hair, dark skin
and a name that most people just couldn't pronounce

She wanted to take on the identity of a fictional character
like those on tv where the girls had great hair and the nicest parents ever
the kind that had really good jobs
yet they found time to be home with their kids
and help them with their homework
they knew exactly what was going on and spoke perfect english

But that wasn't exactly so
She hailed from the 6th floor of an apartment in the projects
where you could hear Frankie Ruiz loud and clear
as a 'hot' car drove by with the best sound system ever

The neighborhood parents spoke broken english
and would work when they found something they liked
if not, they would make the welfare line to ensure they would have
their food stamps at the beginning of the month
and they would never miss the WIC appointments
that granted them milk and cereal

She wanted a name like Melissa with a friend named Stacy
she wanted to hang out at The Max and giggle when her crush looked her way
yet she was way too far from that

The friends she made a school could have formed a map of South America
most of their parents were first generation
working hard to give their kids a good education
the kind that would get them into a good university
where their kids would meet others who did have a name like
Melissa & Stacy
with parents just like those on tv
the kind that would speak perfect english
with mothers that wore pearls over a lavender cardigan
with an over the knee pencil skirt

But by then, she would have already grown to love
everything that made her different
the name that no one could pronounce
with the handle downs and discount clothes
while the girls that sat behind her in class wore Acne jeans 
with Calvin Klein tank tops and those jacquard handbags
ones that she had never seen before

By then the differences that she once hated
were the ones she loved the most
because they made her who she was
they added to her story
they made her proud of the colored threads that made her quilt

And she was proud to her own self
woven with different colors
the ones she finally came to understand
-Bionica

Hair

What is it with people and curly hair?
Yes I have curls
Yes I know they are wild
Yes I know it looks interesting
But that doesn't mean that you can touch them

I am not a circus attraction or an animal at a petting zoo

No you cannot touch my hair
No you cannot touch my hair
No Don't touch my hair!!!

Since when does having curly hair give anyone the right
to just ignore my personal space
and just touch my hair like if it's some sort of oddity
one that should be checked out under a microscope

Take a step back
There are personal boundaries and I don't appreciate you crossing them

How would you like it if I just get all up in your head
Acting as if it were something from Ripley's Believe It Or Not

Sorry, but to your dismay
my differences
Do not make me part of a side show
If it fascinates you so much, buy a wig
They come in all colors for you to 'ooh & ah' over

I own a mirror and know what I look like
I own a mirror and know what I have
And I'm more than ok with it
It took me a long time to embrace it all
Stop trying to make me feel ilke it was a mistake

If I want to walk around all wild & free
Well, that's just me!!!

-Bionica

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Sparks

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They had been together for about a year

His kisses on her lips 

Her hands interwoven between the short strand of his hair 

Caressing his neck with each breath 

As his hand rested on the small of her back 

A luscious routine of what would follow 

After their weekly dates

Sometimes at a diner

Sometimes at the park 

Sometimes at his place 

Where they would end up canoodling on his couch 

But for some reason 

All his great qualities weren't enough 

Sure he just happened to be 

One of the hardest working people she knew

A wonderful son, great friend 

And among other things 

An incredible lover 

But it still wasn't enough 

The sparks weren't there 

To send her to the moon each time they kissed

The butterflies hid somewhere 

And wouldn't even flinch 

Not at his words 

Not at his scent 

And certainly not at his touch 

She wondered why 

Always giving it another try 

Another chance to see 

If perhaps the butterflies would come out of hiding

And make it a party when their lips would meet

When she would hear the sound of his voice

Or see a message he had sent 

But all the sweet mornings 

Good afternoons 

And beautiful evenings they spent together 

They just weren't enough 

The sparks never came 

Things just weren't right

Those feelings were missing 

She did what she could 

But he hadn't understood 

That what she wanted the most 

Just wasn't there 

She didn't dare ask him what he felt 

He may have gotten used to her

To the timber of her voice

Her hands in his 

And everything in-between 

But she still needed more 

And hoped that one day 

He would see what she meant 

-Bionica

Buscando

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In Desperately Seeking Susan

Roberta Glass follows Susan around 

Seeking something different 

A love that's wild and free

In Desperately Seekin Him 

She gets lost in a world of 

What could be 

A fantasy that she clings on to 

As if it were the life raft 

That would determine 

The existence of the rest of her life 

But she knows it 

She has to let go 

Like Roberta she has to forget 

To remember who she is 

And somehow find herself 

Standing alone in all her glory 

A love like no other 

One for herself 

Not a fairytale with a 

Happily Ever After

But the reality of 

Who knows what may be after 

And so as she stands around wearing a new jacket 

She realizes like Roberta, that she just has to let go 

Bid adieu to Gary Glass 

And take a chance on Dez 

Dez who found her just as irresistible 

Ready for more than what can be 

Bionica 

But Why

The second time that she saw him 

He asked her 'what is it that you like about him?'

She didn't know then 

She didn't know exactly what it was about him 

Sure there it was

The obvious 'he's a good person' 

Easy going 

Cool to be around 

And humble, very humble…

But when she got to thinking 

She really didn't know why 

Surely it had to be more than his smile 

The one he flashed her as he walked by 

The way that he took her hand in his

As he thanked her 

Or how to her surprise he 

Held her so close she could feel his heart beat against hers

There was more to it 

But she still couldn't explain it 

All she knew was this 

The mere thought of him 

Made her smile 

The mere thought of him 

Gave her a sense of longing 

To have him close to her

So that once again 

She could feel safe in his arms 

There was something about their silent embraces 

An unspoken language between them 

Than only they could understand 

And she had yet to tell him 

That the anticipation of just seeing him 

Well it made her heart flutter

As if within her 

There were a million feathers 

Just flying around 

Excited to know that he was near 

She felt perfectly comfortable with him 

Ready to risk it all 

For what reason?

She couldn't say 

She didn't know 

Not even to this day 

-Bionica 

Fancy Meeting

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From time to time, 

she would think about him 

wondering what it was that he was doing 

But after so long her memory of him 

just drifted into the distance 

packed away in a library of memories

Then with out expecting it 

she saw him 

and the dimples that continued 

to mark his face whenever he would smile 

she felt the big arms that enveloped her 

in a long over due hug 

And then she heard him say 

how he always wanted to talk to her 

and that's when it all stopped!

Within seconds she imagined 

what he would say 

How he missed her 

How he always wanted to tell her 

that he really liked her

that he wanted to take her out 

But after 5 seconds 5+ later 

He told her 

How he always wanted 

to talk about their 

near death experienced 

that marked them all forever 

Really??

After all this time 

She wondered why 

If it was so, then he could have said something before 

She then smiled as she leaned back into her chair 

and burst the bubble that her friend 

was already blowing after simply hearing 

'I've always wanted to talk to you since…'

To wait another few years to see him again 

And say 'let's talk about it…'

-Bionica

Growth

Really 

What it comes down to 

Is looking back 

And seeing how you have 

Become a better version of your previous self

Just like that

Not to critique all the faults that we all have 

But to see how you have grown 

How you have improved in ways 

That you never thought possible 

Because you never thought 

There was something to improve

Yet

All on your own 

You did it

Sounds like maturity 

And the ongoing lessons 

That life teaches us 

Ever growing 

Forever evolving

-Bionica

Judgement by association

It's not what she wanted
Not anymore
It's what she wanted
To stay far far away from

The sleepless nights
The broken promises that became lies
The endless efforts that were made
Simply to end up where they started

She was tired of getting 'no where'
And so she decided no more

But she realized that perhaps
It was a little harsh
To just runaway the way she did
To never look back at what once was
At those broken pieces that became anew

They were recycled into experiences
Of what once was
Of what currently was
Of what could be

And so she stopped
To listen to the voice experience
And to give life a try once again
After giving up on herself
She decided to give someone else
A much deserved try

This time she was ready to learn
From the ghosts that chased her for so long
This time she was ready to send them flying
Along with some others…

-Bionica

Still

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She remembered
That first day when she arrived
In a town no longer familiar
That she would soon reacquaint herself with

How as she crossed the wide street
There was a young boy right behind her
With a clean face, caramel skin and a dimple in his chin
He wore a cap that was folded more so in the center
Shielding his face the same way
That the clouds were hiding the sun

With a plaid shirt in shades of blue and white
And perhaps a little earthy green
Before she knew it they were walking up
To the same doorstep

Well what a surprise that was
A pleasant one at that

Outside she kept cool and said hello
Not too much but just enough
Inside though
She kept telling herself
'well hello mister, what is your name?'

How could she not?
She was 17 and thought to have found
The love of her life

But it wasn't so
Through out her vacation
They came to talk but nothing ever happened
Perhaps a few stolen stares here and there
But that what was it

Then after 10 years
She still felt it
That giddy feeling
As their eyes met
She was hoping his smile would come with some words
An I like you at that
But that just might be too much

And so after pleasantries were exchanged
It all remained the same
17 all over again
con el amor por dentro (keeping her love secretly hidden)
She couldn't tell him
She wouldn't tell him

But she could still feel it
-Bionica

Beliefs

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It's not that she switched over
It's not that she changed
It was that she found her way

Her journey began at childhood
With the beliefs that were instilled in her
With the beliefs that lead her to learn more

And with that more she did't question
but came to a realization
That which she thought was no longer true for her

The Christian teachings she thought to be
Were no longer for her
Not because she didn't believe
But because she was wanted to be free

In the Maccabees she learned of the battle fought
to let go of all things that did not pertain to God
those idols that some held on to
were no longer for her

Her belief in life that God alone is her path
lead to her to Judaism
Not because she didn't believe in Jesus
No it's not that
It's that she believed that in order to be saved
all you need is God

You need not pray to anyone else but God
This came to be her belief
and not in anything else
because God alone has power over her

Whatever may be in tartarus may be
But to her
it's only One that she can believe in
This is where she found her peace

In accepting that everyone has a different path
everyone will have a different belief
and it is not at all bad
because all are God's children
and all are to coexist in tolerance and love

She found her spiritual growth in the God of Jerusalem
But that doesn't mean one cannot find Him in Allah
In the New Testament with Jesus
In the words of Confucius or even Vatsayana 
She won't know knock it
But she already knows
that she doesn't have to try it

Wherever you look
He is there
Waiting to welcome you in
And hoping that you are just as accepting
of everyone else
as He is of you

-Bionica

Love is Needed

This past summer
A young girl by the name of Karina Vetrano
was found lifeless on the ground, hidden among
the sides of Howard Beach in Queens NY

This happened in August of 2016
6 months later, we are informed that
the person who out right tortured her before
killing her is a 20 year old man

This man claims that he was angry
because there were too many people at his
house, that he apparently didn't want there
Who knows what else was going

He was angry and unfortunately
took it out on Karina

This scares me because Karina
was going out for a run
it was about 5 in the afternoon
she was alone
and it was broad daylight

This can happen to anyone
And it also saddens me
that someone can be so angry
to do something so heinous

What is going on with the world?
Why have human beings lost a sense of love?
Where is the compassion?
Why are we becoming less human?

Be kind
And when you feel that you need to
Step back, take a moment
And breathe
Exhale anger
Inhale Love
Inhale patience

Let peace be your Zen
-Bionica

Me and My Best Friend

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This goes out
To a love that she never thought possible
The unconventional love
Between a girl and her best friend

The face that she sees each night
before going to sleep
and the little belly she rubs when she wakes up

Because nuzzling his ears became a necessity
Because his curly hair is wild like hers
and somehow they can communicate with out words
they're just in sync with each other

Even when he gets a little mischievous
and makes a mess with paper
bits and pieces flying all over
to the melody of barks that initiate
the you can't catch me game

All she can do it love him
all the more
because he really is her best friend

Paws to all the animal lovers out there
and their unconventional friends
-Bionica