Dream a little...

She had been there for more than a year 

And there had been a change 

A change that became stagnant over time like water in a closed bottle 

Out in the sun 

It didn’t didn’t drain, it just stayed there 

Getting hot and maybe cold and then hot again 

Becoming unhealthy 

You see

Things got hard 

She didn’t think they would ever get so hard 

But they did

She felt herself get lost and almost ice over 

As if her soul was fading away the way the night does right before dawn 

She never thought it was possible 

To lose herself the way she almost did so many times before 

But this time the labyrinth was just too deep 

And she forgot to even look for the door 

She forgot that there was a door 

Or at least a way out 

That’s what it felt like working there

As if everything was just lost 

And knowing this 

Her hope faded and she stopped dreaming 

She stopped feeling 

She felt herself go numb, becoming an empty shell 

Like a person that just lets themselves get taken over by the water 

No longer reaching out for air 

She started to fall 

Not at all like the person that first pulled open the door ready for her first day of work 

The brightness she once had was gone 

The place was dimming her light and she knew it 

She wasn’t physically the same 

Each day was monotonous because she lost her hope for a better day 

For a better tomorrow 

She knew things weren’t going to change 

The false hope she was given became a bitter reality of the truth 

That nothing was going to change

She couldn’t keep going 

She was tired of just being 

So she decided to create her own space and turn away 

It could have been hard or it could have been easy 

She had no idea and no longer cared

She just wanted to leave 

She didn’t have a plan 

She didn’t know where to go next 

What to do 

Or where to even start 

But she didn’t care 

She knew she just couldn’t stay there 

So she walked away 

And the hope started to come back 

Because she had something to look forward to 

Like not having to go back to the toxic job that felt like cyanide slowly taking her strength 

The color was coming back to her 

Filling her soul with the rainbow that appears after the rainstorm 

And she could feel her soul smile when the corners of her lips turned up exposing her pearly whites

It had to happen 

A decision to choose herself 

And it wasn’t always understood 

Some might say that she wasn’t in the right mind set letting a job make her feel the way it did 

But some people probably never felt as if their soul was fading everyday as they dragged their body to work 

Perhaps because they don’t know about self care 

Perhaps because they expect others to do the same and just be there 

It wasn’t healthy 

At least not for her 

She knew it 

But she wasn’t sure if anyone else did

So she became her own cheerleader 

Working over time to remind herself that it was ok to let go 

How else could she accept the possibility of all that was to come 

Good things too

Bionica

Parents in the Muck

Let’s be honest, some people were just never supposed to be parents 

It’s quite unfortunate that any knowledge of possible birth control just 

Slipped their minds when it counted most 

Or perhaps they could have been open to the option of adoption 

In hopes to give their offspring a better life, but it just didn’t happen for some 

Instead, some kids grew up with parents so toxic the muck just seemed to get 

thicker and thicker with time 

Every thought they had, every word they said and every thing they did 

Just seemed to be much worse than the last 

Who would have thought that these supposedly adult and or educated parents 

Would have turned out so rotten 

Yup like the yucky tomato that gets forgotten in the fridge 

And grows mold that starts to contaminate the other veggies or fruit as it starts to 

Shrivel up in the cold dark air 

Almost as if to say well ‘If I’m bad, you’re going to be worse’ followed by a sad attempt 

At an evil laugh that just becomes a sad cough because the grossness has taken over 

Never in a million years will I be able to comprehend why parents think it’s ok do things like 

Beat your adolescent child that disagrees with you, instead of using words like a normal mature adult

And the kid doesn’t even have to be an adolescent, that can of whoop a$$ just isn’t going to work 

Because you are missing the bigger picture of communicating why certain things are wrong and 

What is actually write 

If your daughter wants to wear something different than that of your preference, it’s called being an 

Individual with a personality and I do believe that it’s one of the healthiest thing in the world to make 

Proper choices based on what a single person feels to be right for them (of course this is so as long as we aren’t hurting anyone or ourselves)

It’s acceptance that a parent should have because when you have a child, this person is not meant to 

Be your mini me

If not, it would be a Stepford World and that would just be AWFUL!!!!

If your kids like things that you may not feel right for a boy or a girl, get over it 

The year is 2019 and since the dawn of time love has been love and the sexes don’t even matter 

Unless you’re trying to maybe give birth, then you will for sure have to have the ovaries, if not 

Who cares what you do or with whom 

Just let them be who they are and give them love 

If you’re a parent, a certain degree of maturity should really follow 

No need to have screaming matches with anyone or be condescending 

Don’t act like a hormonal teenager that stomps around when things aren’t going their way 

Take a step back and actually look at the picture

Is it really that serious? You’re a parent, not a dictator

Difference is what makes the world go round 

It’s ok if your child doesn’t like what you like

This just means that you should probably get yourself your own friends that are into the same things as you 

It’s a thing, it’s normal 

And then there are those parents who are bothered by every little action or lack there of that a person does and they get super peeved as if something disgusted landed on the tip of their nose and is 

Making it’s way up the nostril 

Get over it! It’s not that serious 

Focus on yourself because the kid can’t go back into the placenta for you to feed it and breathe for the child too 

If you aren’t going to be supportive, don’t be a negative pole either, there is plenty of that to be encountered outside 

Just keep quiet and move it along 

This relationship isn’t based on a court case where the lawyer is coming down on a witness for their client 

The worst thing is that many of these parents are way past 50 and will never think that there is anything wrong with them 

Now I understand why so many people just shy away from their family 

If it’s not necessary (and it’s really not) to be around these grimy people, well stay away 

Don’t let their dirt ruin your polish 

In the long run, you may be very happy with your decision to put your happiness first 

So that you can put more good out there and hope that the discord of your parents will stay at bay 

-Bionica