The Dates

I didn’t tell anyone about it 

I didn’t even think about it 

I just did it without knowing anything 

I basically went in there blind without even knowing the age range of the guys in attendance 

But would it have really made a difference?

Would I have refrained from speed dating?

Probably not 

It was most helpful to know that 2 of my friends were there too 

The best part that is that I can talk to them about one of the guys and they would know exactly what I mean 

When we got to the restaurant my friend began scoping out the prospects

We were there on a mission and she wanted to make sure that her investment in a new lipstick was well worth it

And so while we waited, we speculated wondering if the older man in a cap was one of the daters

I kind of hope that the tall guy with the beard was a contestant but alas he wasn’t 

It was time to take a seat and start chatting 

The host told them men to start off with whom they were interested and there I was for about 2 minutes ALONE!!!

Waiting for someone to strike up conversation on our 5 minute date

It was so that I had to flag someone over 

And when he sat down he told me he was an actor 

I was fascinated because I’m taking some acting classes 

But then I felt like I had to make too much of an effort to keep the conversation going 

It didn’t feel right 

And my 2 friends agreed, he was a tough one 

Then there was the psychotherapist, an intelligent man indeed 

But man it was hard with his hot breath 

Someone tell Bruno that the dragon had to retire after this man talked 

Geez Louise, while we were in the car my friend asked if I wanted some gum and I told her later so that I could pop it in before talking to the guys 

Why didn’t this smart man think to do the same?

This is why it’s always good to go out with friends

Your friends will make the suggestions that you may simply forget… 

The nurse, a nice guy with good hair and glasses 

I liked talking with him and before he got up he looked me in the eyes and said 

‘I like your vibe’

I was so flattered and happy to hear that 

I checked him as a definite yes 

Then there were the 2 boys, friends, engineers and very young 

I had to ask if they were shy and one went to tell me that there are only 7 women at his office and that he is the youngest person there 

So I could totally agree how it could be a little challenging to meet someone 

I wanted to find someone so bad because he’s genuinely cool 

As was his friend the civil engineer that according to my friend, had no clue about the Notorious BIG

Yup!!! 

I mean I remember the girls that were supposed to be mermaids singing ‘biggie biggie biggie can’t you see…’

It was the first thing I learned 

But I guess some people are obviously missing out a little

The urologist, I totally got the I don’t have to tell you that I’m a Dr. because then you are going to be interested in me for my money vibe 

But he soon took the locks off the gate and we spoke about health and the importance of watching what you eat

He told me that it’s ok to go out to eat once in a while but when having a home cooked meal you know what it is that you are taking in 

He told me that he preferred to have the artificial sweeteners in a diet soda and not the high fructose corn syrup 

He had just come back from Cabo and brought back to sodas that he’s saving for a special occasion 

I’m just thinking, dude everyday is a special occasion

Drink that soda up 

What are you waiting for?

If it’s lunch put it on ice and say ah…

The coast guard  

Previously married planning to return to Miami within the next 4 years

So then why are you speed dating over here?

Tinder is what you need for the occasional hook up 

Dude these girls are over 30 looking for a potential mate that will not ask them to move to party city with heat and hurricanes 

Then there was one that I don’t remember what he does but the guy was prepared with a list of questions to ask such as what would you do with a billion dollars

It didn’t feel like a job interview but the third degree was interesting 

I was also asked what I liked to do and one guy said that it was a lot 

Well I want to know, what do you like to do?

Only 3 things and call it a life?

It’s a big world out there full of possibility and a variety of interests 

Why choose just one?

The accountant was nice and had a good smile 

I seriously thought about hooking him up with my friend because I feel like they would get a long 

But he didn’t check me off on his list so now we won’t know what could have been unless life decides to have them meet all on their own without even trying 

Finally there was a missionary that did so well on wall street that he retired and went on to work helping others 

Very noble of him to do but I had to tell him, I am not a Christian and then he said the he loved that 

I told him listen I’m Jewish and he said that he loved that too 

And in my head I said no you don’t, you’re probably just trying to get some because the key of missionary work is to have people turn to Christ

Don’t try to play me my dude, I am not a fiddle 

He put the pressure on my friend when he said I’m going to put you down, are you going to put me down 

Ok well what ever happen to at your own discretion 

Can she make her own secret decisions with out having to publicize them?… 

It was definitely an interesting experience 

So much so that apparently I was so rejected in the beginning that it followed all the way through because I made no matches and was invited to go back again free of charge 

Made me wonder that this has to be rigged to just get people to go out again although I still don’t understand why at no charge 

But how is it that I didn’t make at least one match when the nurse said he liked my vibe and I was positive we could have met up after 

Whatever… I was just trying to make some new friends anyway and hook them up with some other girls… 

 Bionica